5 Years A Family Blessed By Sterling!

5 years ago, on 11/23/2009, our lives were radically changed, in an unbelievable way!  Earl & I were in Nanjing, China to meet Sterling!  He is one of the best gifts we could have asked for, especially as our first child when embarking on the journey of adoption! 

It was a cold day, when we arrived at the CCWA office but Sterling had not yet made it, so we anxiously waited and watched out the window for signs of him.  It was a small room,  filled with three other families also meeting their children.  It was electrifying; emotions running high as we all shared the blessing of becoming a family, together! 

I remember the moment we spotted him...the gray van pulling into the front of the building.  My sweet tiny boy, in a large passenger van, seated all alone.  The orphanage representatives were seated together, in a different row.  It was heartbreaking & exciting, all in the same moment.  I remember thinking, why must he sit alone?  It was his final ride away from the orphanage and he was all alone. We were soon to learn, it was a representation of life in the orphanage-lonely, alone & empty.  I cried tears of sadness & of joy!  That was my boy, there in the window!

He bravely walked into the room with no idea what was happening.  A lady brought him to the couch and I reached out, picked him up and placed him on my lap.  He was, "lifeless."  He had no emotion and no life about him, only a blank stare that was full of emptiness & deep sadness.

In preparation of Sterling's adoption, I talked with other adoptive parents & read the book, "The Connected Child." This is a great book when preparing for an adoption but nothing....absolutely nothing....completely prepares you for that moment you meet your child.....your child who is extremely small for his age, extremely behind developmentally, absolutely no emotions & didn't know how to be held. We brought cheerios with us and he ate them, non stop, and with each grasp, it was as if someone was going to take it away from him.  He ate hastily with determination.  I felt a deep sense of sadness and yet, in complete awe that he was in my lap and from this day forward, he was ours!

Sterling came to us with no language, no speech, no verbal sounds what-so-ever, unable to walk stairs, unable to walk more than a very short distance, without tiring; crying himself to sleep for 4 hours a night-for months to come, eating with such determination that he would eat food off the floor at restaurants & eat until he was sick (or until mom & dad removed the food to prevent him from getting sick) and the list goes on.....HOWEVER, fast-forward 5 years & WOW, the transformation is incredible!  Sterling works hard in speech therapy and continues to make tremendous progress, is a loving, caring boy who has great compassion for others and especially small children & babies, works hard at his studies in second grade, loves his family and would rather be with family than anyone else, has grown by leaps and bounds and the list goes on...he is an incredible boy!

We cannot imagine our lives without his contagious smile, unconditional compassion for others (despite a history of abuse, neglect and malnourishment), a kind and gentle spirit you don't see everyday, a bundle of nerves and a personality of sweetness & sarcasm all rolled into one precious boy! Sterling has radically changed our lives in a way that is indescribable and God has used this little boy to teach us lessons in life, that no other experience could ever teach us!

Sterling, we love you to the end of the earth and there are no mountains or barriers that will EVER keep us apart or keep us from protecting you! You are a direct blessing from God & we are anxious to watch the big plans that God has in store for you!

Sterling at the orphanage, before adoption

Daddy & Sterling meet for the first time! Monday, 11/23/09

 

Daddy walking Sterling out of the CCWA office

 

 

Back at the hotel, mama undressed Sterling's multiple layer of clothing but left the bottom layer of clothing on him.  Sterling, trying to make sense of his new family/his new world.

Sterling sitting in his baby bed at the hotel.  Trying to process what was happening to him.

Wednesday-11/25/09: Signing local province paperwork, that states Sterling is our son!  In the eyes of China, Sterling is ours but not until we travel to the US Consulate in Guangzhou, will the US consider him our child.

 

More family photos at the China CCWA Office, after signing the Chinese Province paperwork!

THANKSGIVING-2009: The following day, Thursday, 11/26/09-we spent our first Thanksgiving together as a family, in Nanjing, China!  We walked across the street on Thanksgiving day and ate at a local restaurant!  It was Rice & Chicken for us that year and we enjoyed every moment!  How blessed we are to have been chosen as Sterling's parents!  We are truly blessed!!

 

Not There Yet.....But Another Step Closer!

We received word that our LID status changed and is now, "Match Review!"  The next step will be a status of, "Matched," and from there, "LOA"!!!  LOA is extremely close to receiving permission to bring our boys home!!!  Our agency said that once our status becomes, "Matched," it is typically about 2 weeks when the LOA is issued!  Y-E-A!!!!

Okay, what does this all mean?  Match Review means that someone is reviewing our request to bring the boys home and that person, whoever they may be, will send a request to both orphanages requesting them to forward the documentation on our boys! Once the officials receive the information from the two orphanages, the LOA can be issued!!!!

LOA= Letter of Approval to adopt our boys!!!!

I know, I know-- about now-- you are thinking.....the "PA" (Pre-approval) means your approved to bring these boys home, right?! ......and oh yea, what about the Dossier, the mounds and mounds of paperwork that tells every last detail of our family, doesn't that mean we can bring our boys home. 

Well, no & no. 

Yes, we submitted a Letter of Intent to China requesting permission to adopt the boys and from there, a PA (pre-approval) was issued, which allows us to submit our dossier with the "intent" to bring the boys home, but not until China reviews our Dossier and verifies that we do meet all the requirements to adopt from China, does China make it official that we are approved to adopt these precious boys! 

LOA= Letter of Approval to Adopt, Ming & Eli!!!

Okay, we're not there yet!  LOA, simply states that yes, we submitted all our paperwork up to this point, yes we meet requirements to adopt from China and yes, Eli & Ming will be our children BUT, several more steps must occur.  The I800 or US Immigration paperwork, that will allow both boys to be US citizens, the moment the plane touches down on US soil, then the Article 5 is issued, which my understanding is paperwork that says, China received the I800 from the US Immigration and it's approved from the US Government, for us to bring the boys home.  THEN and only then, the Travel Approval will be issued.

Travel Approval: Allows us permission to travel to China.  China is a communist country and a travel approval is required (along with a valid passport & visa) to travel to China.

Now, don't get too anxious, we're not there yet.......when China issues the TA (travel approval),we request a visa from the US government.  But, a visa cannot be requested or issued without the TA (Travel approval)

Are you completely lost now?????  Yep, probably so, and  we were too the first time we adopted.  Now that we are on our 4th adoption, it's starting to make more sense.  I say "sort of" only because China is always changing things and with each adoption, something has been slightly different than the previous adoption.

Either way, it's a joy and a blessing that we are further along and another step closer to bringing the boys home to their family!!!!   We are singing praises of thanks!!!! 

Adoption Update!

Here's an update on our adoption!

First and foremost, a huge blessing to share-- God brought us together with someone special, who agreed to come into our home and stay with Arabella and Sterling while we travel!!  That my friends, is a true God story!  This adoption has been very different than our three previous adoptions and while each has its own story, this one by far, is the biggest leap of faith! 

One leap of faith, was trusting God to work it out for us to travel, together-ie: childcare for 3+ weeks with someone we trust. He did so in a big way, finding someone that we've known for years, through a friend & neighbor.  She's a caring and loving, Christian lady who is a grandmother and a retired school teacher! We appreciate her and the love and kindness she will show our children while we are gone!

When starting this adoption, the plan was for Earl to travel solo and this was our plan for a good long while, until we were blessed with the approval to adopt 2 boys at the same time.  At first, we were comfortable with Earl traveling solo; but the more we thought, the more we felt the need for both to travel.  Adopting one child, no problem; while extremely stressful, Earl is more than capable and willing but with 2 children, it completely changes the dynamics.  I felt it was not fair for Earl to manage 2 new children, on his own.  BUT, the biggest issue with us traveling together, was finding someone to care for Sterling and Arabella.  We had no one and knew if it were to happen, it would be a faith walk and trusting God to work out the details.  Praise God, he did and in a super big way!! 

We continue to wait for the Letter of Approval/Letter Seeking Confirmation (LOA/LSC).  We've been counting & waiting since September 11, when our dossier (mounds of paper) was logged into China's computer system.  Last night, we learned that another family adopting, received their LOA after an 80 day wait.  Their log-in date of August 11,  is exactly one month, before us--so, this helps to better gauge when our LOA/LSC will potentially arrive.  We guess around the end of November to the first of December time frame, we will receive our Letter of Approval from China, "officially" approving us to adopt Eli & Ming! 

Below are updated pictures of Eli.  We received a report that said Eli is having a rather difficult time adjusting to his newest foster family.  In less than a year, this is his third foster family.  We can't wait to travel and bring him home so that he will learn to understand the true dynamics of a family and that families are forever.   Please continue to pray with us that our boys remain in God's loving care and remain healthy and safe.